Reality Check

There are people who we are envious of,
People we idolize,
People we want to be in the future,
And then there is reality.

I don't aspire to be someone else,
Other than a supernatural being,
Like a frickin' siren.

Sirens are cool,
They live underwater like mermaids,
And then they turn into humongous ugly bird creatures,
And eat humans' hearts.
So they're like multispecies,
Living underwater,
On land,
And can fly.

Stop for a reality check.

Each reality is different.

Mine is hoping to get through life without being led astray,

To actually live and not just surviving,

To stop being so damn homicidal and suicidal,

To stop being cynical,

To stop being so negatively minded,

To stop trying to push everyone away,

To start actually being human again.

But why being normal when I can be me?

My reality is different from others.

I'm happy with being unhappy,

It makes me aware of my environment,

Even though I seem to be an airhead sometimes,

But at least I live.

Even though sometimes I feel like I don't exist,

I'd like to think that I'm still living,

And not trapped in an asylum.